I close my eyes, even though I cannot sleep. Self sabotaging thoughts creep in as I compare myself to others who are moving in a direction I would like to see myself moving in, but have yet to manifest. I know better than to go there, yet even with my conviction of love and heart and soul trumping all else, there are times that fear and insecurity settle in and rock my boat. I figure it is all a part of this process, and all I can do is continue to transcend it each time it comes up for me.
Instead of feeding these thoughts or talking myself into more positive ones, I just release them all. I close my eyes in an attempt to sleep, and instead a meditative state washes over me. There is a light, a tiny ball of light, that is there in the middle of my forehead. It grows until my body is full of this bright white light, until I am dissolved within it. It becomes all that exists; it is all that exists. All other things fall away: ego, body, emotions, attachments. Serenity and Unity are the names I can give this state of being, although words cannot do it justice. I imagine this is why people meditate, for this result. It is here that I know truth; that I feel peace. I wish to visit here often ;) While this is something I know in my core to be available to us all, it has only been a handful of times I have experienced it; where I can feel the oneness. It is truly incredible, and makes all those worrisome thoughts seem a total waste of time and energy.
Today is the shortest day of the year. Darkness and cold have peaked as a reminder for us to find that light within; that light that is connected to the Source and ever present within each one of us. Today I will set my intentions to grow with the waxing light of the sun. I wish to walk fearlessly in the light. I wish to see that light within every being, and to nurture it. I wish to be nonresistant when the universe shows me it's time to let go of something, as well as brave enough to embrace the opportunities that come my way. I wish to be unwavering in my faith in the greater workings of God, while using the gifts I have been given to continue to propel myself. I wish for this light to shine out of my eyes, my smile, and to pour out of my energy field, spreading like wildfire! I wish for us to mirror it in each other. May we always be able to access love and light, and share it with those around us.